A521.9.4.RB_FodenJohn (Reflections on Leadership)

We suffer too many bad examples of leaders: Richard Nixon, Saddam Hussein, Adolf Hitler, Josef Stalin. Fortunately, we also enjoy many good examples: Winston Churchill, Billy Graham, Abe Lincoln, George Washington, Steve Jobs. Being a good leader is not for the faint hearted and most definitely not for those who don’t seek to serve others. Leading is not telling others what to do or think or even being “in charge.” Leadership demands vision, demands selflessness, and mentors for the long term benefit of the mission and others. Throughout his book, The leader’s guide to storytelling, Denning (2011) stressed and detailed the insightful, unique, and influential roles stories serve in cultivating effective leadership. Prior to reading Denning’s (2011) book, I hadn’t made the connection between a leader’s effectiveness and his/her ability to tell and leverage stories that resonates meaning with the audience or organization. Stories are meant to “paint” a picture or share the storyteller’s vision to galvanize listeners to act.

However, leadership is more than telling a captivating, emotional story to advance an agenda or protect an idea. Denning (2011) introduced the interactive leader as one who involves and embraces (rather than fights) the world around. Interactive leaders participate (up close with their organizations), connect (with their followers), converse as equals (with all), see and embrace (the possibilities), remain relevant (to today’s demands), boast passion (for people and mission), pursue the “fun” (in their work).

Denning suggested an interactive leader “thrives on the connection between things” and boasts several dimensions. I’ve enjoyed numerous leadership opportunities in my 25 year Air Force career, four and a half years of those in command. Consistent with interactive leadership tenets, my focus had been on accomplishing the mission and serving my squadron members. We all can leverage nuggets of participatory leadership to apply in our own roles and opportunities in leading others.

·         Interactive leaders work within the constraints of their environments (rather than fighting them). Don’t push against the world by trying to accomplish their goals without engaging with their surroundings. Don’t apply indiscriminate constraints and guidelines that aren’t consistent with the operating environment. Although I brought a few personal “quirks” to my commands like being impatient and excessively focused on detail, I led my charges within the constraints of military dictates and superior commander expectations. I worked diligently to understand my boss’ priorities, convey those to my unit, and then leverage the strengths of my squadron to meet those priorities. Over three commands, my squadrons served in combat zones (without fatalities), excelled in inspections, improved processes, and reduced spending, as well as supported aggressive, 24/7 flying missions.

·         Interactive leadership creates and removes elements from our “tool kit.” It improves traditional management functions including command, regulation, and optimization with added capabilities. However, it eliminates negative controlling and excessive damaging winner-take-all attitudes.

·         Best of all, interactive leadership expands on personal integrity and authenticity. Followers will respect a leader because of the time, energy, and commitment (s)he invests in the organization and with colleagues and subordinates. Others trust a leader’s professional judgment because they’re confident you’ve mastered your responsibilities and complex environment. Denning (2011) summed it up, “Because you listen to the world, the world listens to you.” The Air Force core values (Integrity, Service, Excellence) helped bolster those same values I held personally and employed in order to command. I commanded everyday understanding others assessed my actions to make sure they supported my comments. While disciplining, I relied on the counsel of others and invested time to meditate/contemplate to render the most fair and timely judgments I could. I’ve issued Article 15s (non-judicial discipline) to those whose work ethic I admired people as well as to those who I disliked. I found consistency to be the greatest challenge of all. I visited frequently with my squadrons during my “walk-arounds.” Heck, I even helped change oil and balance books to demonstrate I wanted to better understand their work.

·         Most definitely interactive leadership doesn’t depend on a published hierarchy. Team success relies on every one “stepping up” to share responsibility, contribute to supporting mission success, and mentor others.

·         Interactive leadership focuses on achieving concrete results, not simply mastering academic concepts. I have to be able to tell captivating and meaningful stories, not simply know how effective story telling would make me a better leader. Command “forced” me outside the “academia” of leadership theory. The more I read books and attended seminars about leadership, the easier leadership seemed. Sure, books and speakers professed leadership was hard and challenging due to people challenges. However, I couldn’t realize how exceptionally challenging (and rewarding) it would be when I sat in the commander’s chair to deploy someone who had already been over in the desert four or five times or would miss his/her anniversary or birth of a child. Or perhaps, how difficult it would be to harshly discipline a good Airman who simply made a mistake. Although I’ve made a lot of great, impact stories throughout my25 years, I’ve found it very difficult to share those stories in order to impact future leadership opportunities.

References

Denning, S. (2011). The leader’s guide to storytelling. San Francisco, CA: Jossey-Bass.

McKay, M., Davis, M. and Fanning, P. (2007). Messages: The communication skills book. Oakland, CA: New Harbinger Publications.

A521.8.4.RB-FodenJohn (Making Contact)

A521.8.4.RB-FodenJohn (Making Contact)

Similar to Monty Python, I continue to search far and wide for my “holy grail” with respect to capturing professional opportunities. Although I enjoy a competitive resume and extensive logistics experience, I must improve and be more comfortable talking (make contact) with “strangers” so I can improve my “social skills.” Why are mature social skills so important to my career? I’m convinced being at ease in “spontaneous” two-person or public conversations demonstrate I comfortably can communicate in otherwise stressful personal and professional settings. When partnered with strong experience and proficiency, my prowess with respect to “make contact” communication would translate to more and better professional opportunities.

I’m comfortable conversing with strangers in professional settings; these “strangers” later become colleagues. I’ve led various planning sessions with representatives from subordinate organizations who I’d met just a few minutes after the start of the event. Earlier in my career, I “jumped in with both feet” in my new commands by meeting and engaging with new people for the first time when I assumed command of these squadrons. I was comfortable talking with colleagues I recently met when they were subordinate to me; I didn’t feel threatened. However, I’m conversationally unsettled from a professional stand-point when I approach others serving in a superior capacity/position to mine or interacting in a social setting. It’s difficult for me to “work a room” with ease because I’m more comfortable and better versed discussing work at a social event or party, then talking about family and personal interests. You can imagine that makes for a fun time for everyone. McKay, Davis, and Fanning (2007) shared the view self-deprecating behavior is one reason for being ill-at-ease with strangers. This model (influenced my behavior with negative thoughts about my “social value”) described my awkward self-consciousness.

I “sport” a quiet personality; my parents set an example of being reserved and don’t “rock the boat” because in the long run it was better to get along to avoid creating dissension. I learned and lived by the credo “God made people with two ears and one mouth so people should listen more and talk less.” I formed my opinions and outlooks by reading and listening to and assessing the beliefs of others. I’ve followed the view “it’s better to listen with an open mind to develop opinions which reflect reality and truth.” I viewed others who just talked (without listening to others) to be conversation “hogs” who were close minded; they didn’t listen to others…and that’s not who I wanted to be. However, serving as an Air Force officer challenged me to “emerge socially from my shell.” My duty and commitment to lead were greater than being comfortable in my reserved personality. As a result, I immersed myself in conversations at all levels. However, I’ve not “conquered” the task of simple, personal conversation…and that’s where Messages can help.

McKay, Davis, and Fanning (2007) shared two rules for connecting that hit me right between the eyes…give attention, interest, and respect to your partner and embrace an outward rather than an inward focus. I’d create conducive, meaningful interaction when I focused on the other person’s perspective. Historically, my focus has deferred to my “perceived” shortcomings: I wasn’t as smart, senior, or as influential as the other person and didn’t focus on what I had to offer the relationship. I’ve neglected easy, common sense cues on how to bond with others. However, McKay, Davis, and Fanning (2007) proposed several guidelines I’ll leverage to connect more effectively:

·         Revolutionize my “body language” to engage and welcome the other person by moving closer, uncrossing my arms and legs, leaning in to the discussion, making eye contact, and smiling. Unfortunately, my “track record reflects that my body language screamed all the wrong tendencies.

·         Use “ice-breakers” to generate conversation. I’ve been concerned with potential rejection or being forced into an unwanted situation. However, Messages listed a few ways to initiate discussion: ask for information, offer a compliment, employ humor. Historically, I’ve not been very good at initiating conversations with strangers in a room or at an event.

·         Strengthen my “art of conversation” using ritual and informational questions, active listening to participate in our discussion, and sharing more of my thoughts to foster closeness and trust. In the past, I’ve struggled with being able to carry a conversation beyond one or two ice-breaker questions.

I’ve lived most of these shortfalls for too long, yet am excited about the opportunities these recommendations offer to make me socially comfortable and influential.

Reference

McKay, M., Davis, M. and Fanning, P. (2007). Messages: The communication skills book. Oakland, CA: New Harbinger Publications.

A521.7.4.RB_FodenJohn (Knowledge Sharing Story)

A dad’s head hurts; how can a dad and his wife afford to send their kids to college in today’s environment of rising tuition costs and dwindling financial aid? Families face numerous common pitfalls trying to pay for their children’s college educations (without going into debt). Success stories are all too uncommon. Like Denning (2011) shared in his book, The leader’s guide to storytelling, a memorable knowledge-sharing story is typically unusual (out of the ordinary). Denning (2011) further iterated most learning experiences rise from bad news. However, positive news stories also play a part in a successful story. In general, families being able to pay for college starts long before students begin attending high school.

For an overwhelming majority of couples, welcoming their children into their families involves truly breathtaking and humbling and proud moments. Parents are often excited for all the excitement of parenthood. Economics are only a few of the concerns that “haunt” parents.

However even before their children are born, financially astute parents agree to build nest eggs to fund their kids’ college educations so they won’t have to borrow from the future. Parents must help their children avoid the tragic and all too common overwhelming burdens of sizable student debt.

A vast majority of parents realize college arrives at their doorstep sooner than later…even when that would be 15-18 years in the future. Most have heard the horror stories of college price tags in the tens of thousands for each of their “critters”… without a plan in sight to create and grow college funds.

Fortunately, parents can rest in the assurance of ageless axioms: “A journey of a thousand miles begins with one step.” And “How do you eat an elephant? One bite at a time.” Parents must research financial resources and discuss concerns with friends, then assemble their plan for their children. Parents’ focus must be for their children to graduate from college incurring student debt.

How can a family achieve that goal in an age where overwhelming college debt crushes the spirits of so many graduates who’ve incurred debt in the tens of thousands? First, immediately start your college saving strategy. As soon as parents receive social security numbers, open savings accounts for them and deposit baby gift monies into their accounts.

Second, leverage state 529 plans:

·         529s are tax free tools. Your kids’ nest eggs grow without losing money to Uncle Sam.

·         Kids are the beneficiaries in a parent’s 529 plan. As a result, the dollar values of those accounts are not “counted against” them when schools/federal government calculates financial aid packages. In contrast, UGMA accounts belong to the student, count as student income and thus lower financial aid potential from other sources.

·         Contributions to 529 accounts are tax deductible with respect to a parent’s state of residence. You may lower today’s state tax burden AND keep contributions to the college funds and their respective capital growth safe from taxes.

·         529s authorize a beneficiary to withdraw contributions for education purposes: tuition, room & board, student fees, etc.

Third, monitor your college investment accounts and look for different tools/programs to improve returns.

Fourth, diversify college fund portfolios. Deposit financial gifts from family members directly into their 529s. Also, retain gift certificates of deposit and U.S. savings bonds until maturity and then deposit those monies into 529s and mutual fund accounts.

Lastly for military members, they enjoy a tremendous education funding “perk.” Military members and retired can access up to 36 months’ worth of tuition payments via the Veterans’ Affairs post 9/11 GI Bill. Transfer GI Bill benefits to your students to pay for college. As a result, they’ll enjoy a nearly full-ride scholarship.

Parenthood is a tremendous privilege and responsibility. However, one of the greatest taks parents face is preparing financially for their children’s college educations to avoid student debt. The effort and commitment requires parents to step out boldly to educate themselves, build a plan, and then execute, monitor, and adjust that plan. Leverage several tools to grow your children’s education “nest eggs”…the greatest tool being the post 9/11 GI Bill. As long as the stock market meets expectations and college costs don’t soar, your children have a “good shot” at earning their undergraduate degrees and still have money left over to build their futures.

Reference

Denning, S. (2011). The leader’s guide to storytelling. San Francisco, CA: Jossey-Bass.

A521.6.3.RB - High Performance Teams

        An old saying many of us are familiar with states, “The smartest one of us is never as wise as all of us.” Or another common phrase most of us are familiar with, “There is strength in numbers.” These nuggets of wisdom make sense for a reason; people in a group who introduce and discuss ideas tend to make better and more comprehensive decisions. In his book The leader’s guide to storytelling, Stephen Denning (2011) introduced four categories of groups.

·         Work group: People working on same job or goal. Each person has a defined responsibility and all work group members work for the same supervisor.

·         Team: Members must remain interdependent to achieve the group objective(s). They share common goals, coordinate activities, share responsibility for performance in a defined period.

·         Community: People who share a common interest or values, but aren’t necessarily working in a tactical effort towards a specific goal. Communities are more widespread over time and distance and even national borders. Common core values and genuine personal interests hold a community together.

·         Network: A collection of people (formal or informal organization) who maintain contact with one other due to a mutually perceived benefit of remaining in touch for certain purposes. (LinkedIn, alumnae associations)

Teams and communities share a few features; they are energized to work collaboratively towards a specific product or service. Teams are building blocks for organizations to adapt to change and overcome challenges. Denning (2011) stated “high-performance teams resemble communities.” (pg. 155).

I’ve enjoyed more successes in working on teams in my 25 year Air Force career than I can “shake a stick at.” I led many teams and became adept at leveraging talent and mitigating roadblocks. My favorite teams (success stories) were the large, complex squadrons I commanded while serving at Offutt AFB, NE, Hill AFB, UT, and Baghdad.

My tenure at these three commands match the characteristics as Denning defined them (pg. 155).

 

·         Clear goals/appropriate leadership & membership. Qualified and well-trained Airmen in each of these three squadrons professionally achieved their missions: shipped cargo, transported passengers, managed supplies, planned deployments, repaired aircraft parts.

·         Adequate resources/support to achieve the objective. Managed unit budgets valued at more than $800,000 as well as requisitioned equipment, parts, and supplies to operate and maintain the unit’s vehicle fleet.

·         Actively shape the expectations of those using output…then exceed expectations. The squadron began one year with goals it sought to achieve: we built a passenger deployment center, renovated the mobility warehouse, and excelled during a headquarters inspection. At the end of the year, our command recognized the squadron as best unit in the command (as well as multiple individual awards) from our accomplishments throughout that year.

·        Innovate in a moment; seize and leverage opportunities. First, I launched the first movement departure airport in the U.S. to deploy 850 Airmen from 15 bases bound for Iraq. Next, in concert with the Marines, my squadron in Baghdad airlifted 1,300 Iraqi poll workers to polling sites. Those efforts assured the ratification of Iraq’s Constitution in 2005-2006.

·         Know your team. Become familiar with individual member goals. I visited each of the sections in my unit weekly to be better acquainted with squadron members. Better understood their personal, disciplinary, and financial challenges in order to collaborate with their supervisors to develop solutions to issues.

·         Share organization history and identity. Members relate to each other then use that emotional connection to achieve the objective. I sponsored squadron social functions (picnics, beach parties) to bring Airmen together. I hosted monthly commander’s calls to share mission priorities, expectations, awards presentations, and shared upcoming events.

Shared values are essential for building teams because they make possible a common prioritization of effort so a team can plan and operate in concert. When I commanded my units, we all shared dedication to mission as well as the Air Force core values: integrity first, service before self, excellence in all we do. Executing these core values unfolded in each of the three bases at which I served. Airmen in these squadrons deployed without complaint to Iraq and Afghanistan, many on multiple tours… they were simply focused on mission.

In addition to embracing shared values, teams excel via trust, enduring relationships and collaboration. Trust enables team members to release creative, innovative actions because a team member is confident his/her teammates will assist in overcoming challenges. One of the areas I focused on as a squadron commander was to support my Airmen in their personal priorities as well as their professional responsibilities. I ensured eligible members attended technical and professional military courses and recommended qualified ones for greater responsibilities. These Airmen were confident leadership advocated for their personal and professional goals.

Trust facilitates enduring relationships to enable seamless planning and execution of corporate goals and actions. Throughout my five plus years of command, I built enduring relationships through daily interaction with Airmen. They performed outstandingly and exceeded expectations of senior leaders. While deployed to Baghdad, and at the direction of my boss, I directed one of my subordinate flights to lay down hard plastic “puzzle tiles” in high traffic outdoor areas to counter the messiness of the mud for the upcoming rainy season. My boss’ original plan was to cover a couple of small areas in the compound. However, a leader from one of my subordinate flights suggested covering the entire compound area to eliminate the mud problem throughout the terminal…improvement to mission resulted from enduring relationships.

Collaboration is closely and actively coordinating to complete a complex project and is applied whether in a leadership or followership role. I’ve collaborated at multiple levels during every single one of my 11 assignments. So, groups I led achieved desired end-states: deployed to Iraq, Afghanistan, Saudi Arabia, or Panama; created process to re-integrate Airmen returning from a deployment; managed war supporting equipment in Europe; developed a capability infrastructure to respond to terrorist attacks in the U.S. and many more.

Fortunately, I’ve had only a few negative experiences throughout my AF career. However, I’ve experienced some challenges with respect to corporate values in recent employment. The unit was blessed with a lot of high energy, smart military, government civilians, and contract employees who simply wanted to accomplish a complex mission. However, the organization suffered from dissonance. It battled numerous conflicting priorities and frustrating personnel policies. It espoused values included: value employees, train personnel to do the job, be prepared to deploy rapidly at any time to anywhere in the U.S. to conduct our mission. However, some of the operational values didn’t follow those ideals. Many of the employees have been frustrated by what they view as senior leadership unconcerned with impacts of unrealistic expectations and deadlines, the workload and challenges the employees face. The unit has undergone a couple of climate surveys to better understand and correct the sources of the frustrations. The “jury is still out” on how the command will temper employee frustrations. Also, although the unit states it wants to sponsor its employees for training, it constrained a few employees from attending due to the ops tempo of the unit (“can’t afford” to let certain people go to attend). Last, unit leaders continue to “battle” internally about how the unit should deploy when tasked. We continue to refine, re-engineer, overhaul processes that should have been set years ago. So, the “cloudiness” lends itself to lack of understanding by the very folks who have to carry out those actions.

Team mechanics and interaction, shared values, and collaboration are essential elements to maximize team performance. Synergy really is the “name of the game” because it creates enduring energy, commitment, and ideas to work through complex, challenging opportunities… like command.

References

         Denning, S. (2011).  The leader’s guide to storytelling: Mastering the art and discipline of business narrative. San Francisco, CA: Jossey-Bass.

A521.5.4.RB_FodenJohn (Aligning Values)

As employee or owner (or manager), do you find it easy or enjoyable to go to work every a.m. or Monday? Do you fear or look forward to sharing 8-10 hours of your day with colleagues and supervisors? What drives your anxiety (or excitement)? Do you believe your values conflict with or support your organization’s values and efforts? Individuals and groups make progress (or not) via their values. Will values you practice everyday confirm your (personal or corporate) espoused values/mission or counter them?

 Denning (2011) characterized four sets of values organizations operate under to conduct business: robber barons, hardball strategists, pragmatists, and ethical. Of particular note, organizations embrace ethical values when they supports employees’ well-being simply because those values are the “right thing” to do, not because they increases profit. Or when an organization pursues eco- or community friendly practices even when not required. An ethical business is one that does what’s right or responsible for intrinsic purposes, not simply for ulterior profit, instrumental, or organizational benefit. 

Organizations must create a roadmap as to how they want to get from here to there. In what manner they want to achieve their goals. Values development define these initial, elementary elements. How do organizations develop and align values?

 First, decide what your corporate values are and then clearly explain those values to employees, partners, and customers. An organization must establish its mission/objectives, yet make sure its values are consistent with that mission. Some wonder if an organization/business can remain effective if it pursues moral values to the detriment of its stated (existential) mission. Denning alluded businesses have forgotten how to incorporate ethics because they pursue shareholder value (financial gain) at the detriment of ethics/values.

Next, an organization must assure employee values are consistent with organizational values to generate parallel energy. Denning (2011) claimed employees are better connected with an organization to which they can relate stating, “Clarifying values, for instance in a workshop on the subject, can lead people to understand how they are personally connected with the organization’s values – or not.” (pg. 135) Organizations can facilitate a similar relationship between organizational and personal values by hiring to that standard. Also, by an organization demonstrating how effective its values are in practice, most employees would naturally commit to supporting those values. If too much negativity exists in the work-force, it is an indication some employees and the organization don’t share (at least some) values.

 Organizations must operate consistent with their corporate values so those values become more than simply a catchy slogan. Denning (2011) asserted organizations not operating within their espoused values lose customers and disenfranchise employees. He stated “The hypocrisy involved in espousing values that are not acted on generates significant distrust.” (pg. 136)

 After that, the organization must protect its values to nurture the trust it has built with its customers/employees. Then be prepared to re-instate those values if time/business practices degrade them.

Organizational values can be aligned with personal values. Denning (2011) built a template (pg. 150) to develop and align organizational values. Primary actions include:

·      Define specific values I’d like to communicate or feel are important
·      Are there other corporate values in conflict with it? Have there been conflicting events?
·      Draft a story that espouses those values. Can audience relate to the story/protagonist?
·      Does the story link to purpose in telling it?

Dr. Randall S. Hansen created the Quintessential Careers website which published a workplace values assessment enabling anyone to evaluate personal values which can be used to pursue careers or employers consistent with those values. The “Workplace Values Assessment” stated “People expect to achieve certain ideals from their jobs, employers, and careers. These workplace values, concepts, and ideas that you hold dear have a direct impact on your satisfaction with your job, with your career, and even with your life. When you understand the values you cherish most highly, you can make an evaluation about whether your current (or a prospective) employer supports those values.” After completing the assessment, one should be prepared to pursue employment with an organization that carries those same values.

 Denning (2011) discussed aligning organizational structure with values to ensure consistent corporate stories, policies, and practices for reliable messaging to employees, customers, and public. He suggested the importance of using a reward system that encouraged behaviors, attitudes and actions consistent with values. Compensation should be engineered to encourage desired behavior toward cherished values.

Next, Denning (2011) labeled three components to fashion an ethical community.

·         Trust: Corporate expectation that colleagues will behave in the best interests towards each other. I have confidence what you tell me (to the best of your ability) is true or will happen.
·         Loyalty: Accept responsibility to hold back from offending each other’s good intentions and satisfy the responsibilities resulting from that trust. (I won’t try to counter your plans).
·         Solidarity: Safeguard the interest of others even if it conflicts with selfish priorities. (I will support you, no matter what).

 I serve in an operational military headquarters unit staffed with civilian, Army, Navy, Marine, and Air Force personnel. The unit’s rank structure ranges from mid-level enlisted to our commander who is a two-star general. From my mid-management position, I anticipate the unit should bolster it trust, loyalty, and solidarity. These building blocks have been compromised from traditional service rivalries and the untraditional processes our unit implements because of the organization’s non-traditional structure. There appears to be inter-directorate dissonance at senior levels as well as conflicting guidance from our command level. Also, our command suffers from employee dissatisfaction and frustration due to workload to personnel expectations. Our commander directed the unit participate in two climate assessments/surveys to understand the gravity of these values shortfalls in order to institute a recovery plan. In my humble opinion, senior leadership could dissipate much of the disharmony by taking into consideration employee concerns and insights to boost clear, precise guidance for action.

            Creating and aligning consistent, effective corporate and individual values is the blueprint in standing up an organization that effectively achieves its objectives. Values are the foundation of what the organization can become and what it represents (to its employees and customers). Values either produce positive or negative attitudes and energy. What do the values of your organization convey to its shareholders and its mission?

References                           

Denning, S. (2011). The leader’s guide to storytelling: Mastering the art and discipline of  

            business narrative. San Francisco, CA: Jossey-Bass.

Hansen, R. (2013). Workplace values assessment: Do you know the work values you most want in

             a job and an employer -- and does your current employment reflect those values?
             A quintessential careers quiz. Retrieved from

             http://www.quintcareers.com/workplace_values.html

 

Whalen, D.J. (2007). The professional communications toolkit. Thousand Oaks, CA: Sage

          Publications, Inc.

A521.4.3.RB_FodenJohn (Subtleties of Communication and Hidden Messages)

Oh when I was growing up, if I had a nickel for every time my mom told me (or my wife when she tried to knock sense in to me), “stand/sit up straight,” “don’t slouch,” “speak up, I can’t hear you,” or “be mindful of your tone (of voice).” I thought their “suggestions” were intended to simply make me “behave myself.” I didn’t understand the rationale behind their guidance. I took those lessons to heart. However, McKay, Davis, and Fanning (2009) introduced an urgency to make sure I incorporate these “non-verbal rules of the road” into how I convey who I am and how I communicate. I must remain conscious of what/how I present, yet communicate without being overly self-conscious of body language mechanics. I didn’t realize the overwhelming influence non-verbal cues and vocals command for communicating effectively.  As I read the text, McKay, Davis, and Fanning (2009), hit me between the eyes when they stressed poor body posture and quiet demeanor/ voice convey submissiveness and lack of self-confidence resulting in less impact to affect others or a situation. Even how I stand during conversation (crossed arms and leaning away or turned) “shouts” I’d rather be somewhere else. No wonder others may view me as socially clumsy. I tend to speak loudly and am more confident when leading large groups/ audiences. I was at ease and animated while in front of my 300-person squadron during monthly commander’s calls. I conveyed and my squadron returned interest and excitement. However, I’m less vocal, more stand-offish, and less confident/assured while participating in smaller groups, especially staff meetings with senior officers…and I didn’t even realize it…until McKay, Davis, and Fanning. My voice tends migrates to “flatness”; I’ve learned from past interactions, emotions tend to override what I was say. I learned to consciously moderate my volume to remove emotion and simply convey my verbal message. I didn’t want people to know what I was thinking, so I used a flat tone to hide intent/mindset. However, I had inadvertently conveyed disinterest and boredom instead. I’d compromised my verbal message when I removed emotion.

Every Tuesday, I host a teleconference with five organizations spread across the U.S. I’ve met some of the teleconference participants only a couple of times, so we’re not overly familiar with each other. However, I don’t vary my voice/tone when speaking during these meetings which makes an already lackluster agenda even more so. I need to adjust my tone as well as pace of my voice to become conversational as opposed to instructional. Altering tempo and rhythm should draw my listeners into the discussion.

McKay, Davis, and Fanning (2007) opened my eyes about a “hidden agenda”…I didn’t realize I clung to any. However, I realize I use one that has been detrimental to my effectively communicating with colleagues. With the high number of commitments and activities I balance, it’s easy to understand how I’ve donned an “I’m Tough” agenda. McKay, Davis, and Fanning described this hidden agenda as a workaholic who voluntarily carries an overbearing work load. The offender’s goal is to show how much harder/longer (s)he works than anyone else. The offender seeks relief from criticisms and requests via this behavior. The “tough guy” may not realize (s)he is simply trying to avoid hurt and protect his/her self-esteem. Behind the “I’m Tough” exterior is a person concerned about rejection and insecurity. Unfortunately, I see many of these “tough guy” qualities in my behavior and outlook. My “To Do” list is way too long…there’s never enough time in the day... there’s always one more thing to do…or don’t ask me to volunteer because I’m too busy with my own concerns. I know I should invest more time in helping others, being with my family, or socializing with colleagues, but I find myself checking off my “things to do,” rather than catch a breather to engage with others. Just one (of many) example: on Nov 12, 2013 in Hampton Roads, (VA) my wife and I both enjoyed a rare “day off.” My son was at school and the weather was a balmy 67, with a cold front on the way for the afternoon. Most husbands would have jumped at the chance to take their wife on a day trip to just “get away” for a little bit for “catch-up” time. Maybe a movie and lunch or even a trip to the beach…whatever, even just a few hours. What did this “knuckle-head” do? Shared a breakfast date at Panera Bread with my bride and then returned home to start my homework and do five hours of yard work. Or at work, when my office sponsors an in-office breakfast, I tend to eat fast and go right back to work (as opposed to socialize) because there’s so much I have to get done. I’ve searched for the “Holy Grail” on how to “fix” this problem. To take a bit more time to interact socially with family, friends, colleagues, etc. On pg. 88, McKay, Davis, and Fanning recommend the “tough guy” takes time to take care of him/herself and relax. Although, I’m better than I have been, I’m not “there” yet. It’s a struggle every day because I’ve become “comfortable” in my stressed pursuit for security and acceptance.

Reference

McKay, M., Davis, M., & Fanning, P. (2009). Messages: The communication skills book.

            Oakland,CA: New Harbinger Publications, Inc.

A521.3.4.RB_FodenJohn (Personal Reflection)

I re-count a handful of experiences that became “life changers” for me…fervently setting me to a new direction because of their impacts. I thoroughly enjoyed my childhood years because I grew up in a stable, traditional home.

        In the summer of1967, when I was about five years old, I was visiting my great grandparents who lived on an old farm outside of Philadelphia. During my visit, my great uncle and I made a wager of 25 cents for which I don’t even remember the details of the wager. However, I distinctly remember I lost the bet. I “mistakenly” hoped my great uncle would “forgive” my wager and let me keep my bright, shiny quarter. However, he reminded me that we had both agreed to the wager and I needed to pay up. I didn’t want to give up my quarter, which was a lot of money for a five year old, so I began crying. My uncle relented…he wasn’t happy at all with my behavior and not being willing to pay for the bet I lost “fair and square.” However, I remember to this day what he said to me in a cross tone, “Johnny, don’t ever make a bet you’re not prepared to lose and honor.” From that single experience, I realized I was responsible for the actions (and consequences) of my decisions. When a choice I made turned out well (or poorly), I needed to look in the mirror. Also, I deliberated in deciding how to minimize my exposure(s) to risk. I questioned assumptions and investigated options from different views. I started my critical thinking journey at a young age. Since my “wager experience” so long ago, I now analyze my circumstances to make well thought out decisions to reduce risk in professional and personal areas.

Yet as I grew older, I recognized my parents had protected me from many of the “crazy things of life in the big world.” I was going to have to be “schooled” in hard knocks to prepare for success in young adulthood and beyond.

When I returned from my Boy Scout summer camp at the age of 12 in 1974, my parents told me they had just purchased an old farm house and small luncheonette on a two-acre property in rural Bucks Co., PA. Buckingham sits one hour north from where I and my younger siblings had been raised in a busy suburb adjacent to Philadelphia. My dad bought the property without getting “buy in” from my mom (or us kids). Needless to say, none of us was happy about leaving friends, school, and our neighborhood for a “Great Unknown.” Adjustments to “life in the country” were tough over the next few years. However growing up, I learned how to work in the family restaurant adjusting to a medley of customers and personalities (professionals, truck drivers, farmers, mechanics, builders, etc.). Also, I became adept in cooking and preparing meals, “waiting” tables, as well as cleaning the restaurant. When my friends slept in late on the weekends or went to the movies, dined, or just had fun on a weekend night, my siblings and I worked at the restaurant. Not a fun experience for six years until I left for college. However, as I re-assess my teen years at our family restaurant, I realize my experiences enabled me to thrive in an array of situations and challenges. I became adept at relating to difficult and “easy going” personalities. Not that I’d admit this to my dad, but my days toiling in our family restaurant empowered me to grow as a team builder, manage time and conflicts and personalities, establish priorities, embrace unfamiliar opportunities, and learn how to build a plan. These traits served me well as I ventured into the challenges of the “big world” of college in central New Jersey.

I thoroughly enjoyed my college experience at Rutgers University over the next four years. I made quite a few life-long friends, earned a degree in Business, and involved myself in many of the University-sponsored activities: sports, clubs, special events.

My “gift to myself” for graduating from Rutgers University in 1984 at the age of 21 was to go backpacking for six weeks through Europe with my best friend, Bill. We looked forward to the adventures ahead: sleeping at youth hostels and with family; travelling via train and a Eurail pass; visiting the sites. I saved for an entire year to purchase my plane ticket, Eurail pass, and youth hostel ticket. I pored over train schedules and studied all the books and pamphlets about the seven countries we were to visit…the internet didn’t yet exist. Our trip was memorable from take-off from JFK Airport on my very first airline flight (at age of 21) to the ferry and train rides travelling from London across the North Sea to the Netherlands. Throughout our six week adventure, Bill and I negotiated challenges posed by language barriers, East German border guards at the East/West German border train station, changing money (no euros), tight budgets, finding places to sleep every night, meeting up with family and friends, as well as organizing day trips to places we never imagined. My friend and I flew from our final stop in London. We had thoroughly enjoyed the trip of a lifetime and made friends we still have to this day. I had been committed to going on my trip despite being nervous during the planning phase. I had ventured way beyond my comfort zone, even during the first few days of the trip. However, I noticed within a few days of arriving in Europe I had learned how to order a meal, arrange for a room, and plan a train/bus venture despite significant language barriers and not being familiar with the cultures. Although not its original purpose, my trip of a lifetime transitioned me from being a “play it safe home body” to become a confident, self-assured explorer. I was on my way to independence. I was no longer intimidated by new challenges in unfamiliar opportunities. I was confident and proficient in planning and setting agendas. One of the trip’s benefits for future opportunities was it empowered me to operate and plan with flexibility. I could adjust to fluid conditions with little warning. I was more proficient in my budgeting abilities as I made my fixed stipend (and laundry) last six weeks. These new tools in my “toolkit” enabled me to succeed in upcoming rewarding opportunities arriving within just two and five years of my return…becoming an Air Force officer and moving out on my own (1986) and marrying my best friend (1989) and starting our family.

References                           

Denning, S. (2011). The leader’s guide to storytelling: Mastering the art and discipline of  

            business narrative. San Francisco, CA: Jossey-Bass.

Whalen, D.J. (2007). The professional communications toolkit. Thousand Oaks, CA: Sage

           Publications, Inc.

A521.2.3.RB_FodenJohn Danger of Single Stories

The diversity we embrace generates our new possibilities…engenders innovative thinking and reflection. Familiar and “comfortable” thinking simply constrains our vision of community and world. Ms. Chimamanda Adichie, in her powerful TED discussion “The danger of a single story” compellingly asserted that a “single story(line)” limits readers to a “slimmed down” version of the context. Ms. Adichie challenged us to pursue new narratives (themes) to challenge the entrenched understandings of our world.

In his book “The Professional Communications Toolkit,” D. Joel Whalen suggested audience members “remember the first thing they hear and the last thing said.” Ms. Adichie adeptly began her discussion stating “I’m a storyteller and I want to share a few personal stories about what I call the danger of the single story.” In those few words, Ms. Adichie alerted us to the unpleasant consequences of familiarizing ourselves to only one story(line). However, she ended her discussion with an appeal to choose wisely and beyond the singe story, stating “When we reject the single story, we regain a kind of paradise.”

I’m convinced Ms. Adichie effectively identified and conveyed her disappointments, reflections, and hopes that we challenge ourselves to move beyond a single story in better understanding our world. Her experiences growing up as a young woman in a middle-class, Nigerian family gave her unique perspectives as she engaged with American friends and Western ideas.

During her first couple of minutes in the introduction, Ms. Adichie exemplified the power and limitations of speaking extracted from Whalen’s “Professional Communications Toolkit.” She shared embarrassment with her realization that she imposed prejudices from her early reading of Western culture/orientation and subsequent transposing that onto her early writings. She grew up reading books (and writing) about blond-haired, blue-eyed Caucasians, snow, talking about the weather, and ginger beer. Yet, she and her family/friends didn’t experience these things in everyday life in Nigeria.

Later in her talk, Ms.Adichie shared how she began writing (and reading) more works relating to her Nigerian heritage. Whalen plainly wrote about the importance of connotative symbols in communicating ideas across a spectrum. The meaning of a word can change from person to person as each person’s narrative differs from experience. Ms. Adichie shared several examples of one-way thinking about other nationalities developed via labeling (not personal interaction). She shared stories of the ignorance of her college roommate referencing Ms. Adichie’s supposed familiarity (or lack thereof) with respect to tribal music, western kitchen appliances, and English (as a first language). Ms. Adichie even shared her own embarrassing personal misconceptions were due to a constrained narrative about Phillipe (her family’s Nigerian “house boy”) whose family was supposedly too poor to make baskets or own nice things or her early views that Mexicans were lazy and just wanted to cross the border illegally for jobs and free health care.

Ms. Adichie leveraged springboard stories throughout her narrative calling out the dangers of relying on single stories to frame personal thoughts. She followed Denning’s (2011) framework for creating and sharing springboard stories which were detailed in his book “The Leader’s Guide to Storytelling.” Denning pointed out leaders prefer to employ a springboard story because this style “communicates a complex new idea and inspires action to implement it.” (pg. 59)  Ms. Adichie relied on several springboard stories inspiring her audience to ignore the single story and explore more and less obvious possibilities. She employed springboard stories whether they referenced her reading/ writing books as a young child, building an opinion of her family’s domestic help, adjusting her view of Mexicans, or educating her roommates on what it “means” to be African.

Denning (2011) stressed orators leverage springboard stories to motivate listeners to “invent the future” which was exactly the intent of Ms. Adichie’s dialogue. She clearly showed how easy it is for anyone (but especially for Westerners) to formulate opinions and viewpoints based on a single prevalent narrative…which typically turned out to be inaccurate. She was concerned about overcoming what she defined as “African authenticity”…the perception that many Africans are too middle class, professional, and advantaged and not sufficiently poor, uneducated, pitied.

Ms. Adichie closely followed the model Denning (2011) outlined for incorporating a springboard story in to her presentation. First, she generated attention for her TED session by introducing negative stories with respect to her parochial awareness of her life which then fostered a single story (reading/writing Western ideas about Africa and her understanding of the experiences of hired help). Her stories attracted her audience to her narrative because her narrative is our narrative in that everyone tends to stereotype the unfamiliar.

Second, once Ms. Adichie defined her dilemma which generated stereotypes, she sought to stimulate a desire for change. She emphatically proposed that a single story creates a stereotype. The issue isn’t that stereotypes are untrue, but that they are incomplete. Stereotypes make one story become the only story. She reminded us that Africa is more than just famine, crime, lost resources, disease. Focusing on negatives robs people of dignity. In convincing her audience that stereotypes leave the audience’s understanding as incomplete, she challenged it to access and  investigate more stories.

Last, Denning (2011) proposed the storyteller reinforce change with compelling reasons to solidify the audience’s commitment. Ms. Adichie showed the change to multiple stories as convincing because audience members would no longer limit their understanding by a single story. The audience’s understanding would now be opened to nuanced realities extracted from multiple sources vice “black and white” opinions formulated from a narrow source.

            Ms. Adichie’s narrative was enlightening and convincing. She brilliantly defined her purpose: uncover the “ugliness” of the single story and then implored the audience to commit to creating more realities based on multiple and differing stories and nuanced ideas.

References                            

Adichie, C. N. (2009). The danger of a single story. TED. Retrieved from

           http://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story.html

Denning, S. (2011). The leader’s guide to storytelling: Mastering the art and discipline of  

            business narrative. San Francisco, CA: Jossey-Bass.

Whalen, D.J. (2007). The professional communications toolkit. Thousand Oaks, CA: Sage

            Publications, Inc.